I never thought I would have to write a blog post like this. I thought that once I left high school that I would be leaving high school bullshit behind.
Hardy fucking har.
Apparently there is a rumor floating around my little corner of the knitting world that my friend Chris has been harassing me. That it has gone beyond “Making Monica Uncomfortable” to “Sexually Assaulted Monica.”
These claims are baseless, ugly, and false.
DID NOT HAPPEN EVER. EVER. EVER.
Someone approached Chris’s girlfriend Tammie anonymously- someone who isn’t involved- and told her that there was a rumor going around. I bet it was the person who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night.
Now, Tammie is annoyingly respecting this person’s privacy, so I cannot confront them for details. I have to lay out this whole shitty version of Operator for everyone to see.
I have no idea who started this rumor. I have no idea why it was started. Chris has said some uncomfortable things to me in the past. I’ve had to tell him “Dude, pull back.” And he does. It’s that simple. Know why? Because he respects me. Because we’re friends. He apologizes profusely, and it doesn’t happen again.
I have no problem handling shit like this myself. I have no problem getting in someone’s face and telling them that they are being rude and that they need to knock it the hell off. If, for whatever reason, I didn’t think I could approach Chris, I know for a fact that I can approach Tammie. Or Fiona. And I haven’t had to because nothing has ever gotten that far.
I am so confused as to how this mess got started. Did you hear or see something that made you uncomfortable so you assumed that I was uncomfortable? If so, you really should have come to me first. That’s what gets me: no one came to me. I’m one of the people involved. I could have set this whole thing straight god only knows how long ago. I don’t know how long this has been going on. I feel horrible for Chris that anyone could think he would do something like this. I feel horrible for Tammie and Fiona that malicious rumors are being spread about someone they love.
While Tammie and I have been texting trying to figure out what the hell is going on, another option popped up. That someone could have started this rumor out of maliciousness. Why? Are you angry at Chris or myself? Or both of us? Why couldn’t you just approach us like an adult? This rumor doesn’t just hurt me and Chris. It hurts the people we love, who love us- Tammie, Fiona, Richie. Any of our friends who know this is so far from the truth.
I genuinely hope this is just a horribly misguided interpretation of I don’t know what. Because the only other option is malice, and I really don’t want to believe anyone in my knitting life is capable of such cruelty and viciousness.
I hope this post eases the minds of Chris, Tammie, and Fiona, and does them some justice. I also hope it squashes any rumor regarding Chris and myself. If you have any problem with either of us, or perceive there to be a problem between us, just pull up your knickers and approach us. You’ll get the unvarnished truth straight from the horse’s mouth.
To quote Wheaton’s Law, “Don’t be a dick.” Also, don’t make me have to write a post like this again.
P.S. Feel free to pass this around to your knitting friends. The sooner this is dealt with, the better.